Nothing is more exciting for an author than anticipating a new book coming out. And 30 Lessons for Loving: Advice from the Wisest Americans on Love, Relationships, and Marriage will be out in a little over a month (January 8). There’s a lot of attention and activity starting already.
First, visit our great new website for the Marriage Advice Project. Check out the video on the new book, connect to our Youtube channel with videos of elders sharing their lessons on love, relationships, and marriage, and add your own lessons for loving.
Second, here’s your chance to get a free copy! There’s a giveaway on Goodreads between now and December 8. Enter to win a free copy of the book, hot off the press.
Gerontologist Pillemer shares findings from his survey of 700 people in “very long marriages” (the shortest here have lasted three decades, the longest, more than five) for tips on maintaining successful long-term relationships. The respondents, charmingly called “the experts” by Pillemer, share “storehouses of invaluable lived experience” on areas including questions to ask yourself before settling down, domestic violence, and late-in-life sex. Communication is discussed at length via six lessons, including being polite to your partner within “the comfortable informality of married life” and choosing the appropriate time for serious conversations. The experts break down conflict by examining the “five major stressors” that affect most relationships, with rules for dealing with the in-laws and properly delegating household labor. In addition to summarizing his survey’s results, Pillemer shares the experts’ own words. One respondent describes divorcing her husband and remarrying him 64 years later, while an 88-year-old “rough and tumble” Korean War veteran suggests taking an interest in your partner’s preferred activities, remarking, “I went to operas. Operas!” The benefits of such a comprehensive study incorporating so many years of experience should be ample, for newlyweds and contemporaries of the respondents alike. The advice is astute, fresh, and well selected by Pillemer. This book would serve as an excellent gift for newlyweds.
Stay tuned for more announcements as we count down to January 8 (including a surprise media appearance…)!